Monday, December 7, 2009

motherhood FAIL.

i'm gonna be honest with you guys today - i have nothing to make your lives more exciting or awesome today.

here's why: for starters, it's monday and the weather sucks today.  it's rainy and cloudy and dreary and the snow was too short lived last friday.  and the bigger reason: i'm a bad mom.

i thought i was being a good mommy by getting baby bailey new special dog treats.  by new special dog treats, i mean these chewy, nasty, beef sticks that are apparently the worst possible thing to give dogs.  (question: why the eff would they sell them then, you and i both ask??  answer: the same reason why they sell mcdonald's for human consumption.)  anyways, so i get bailey these chewy "treats" - which she freakin' LOVES, by the way.  i give her four, actually.  (i think one may be the limit for little dogs.)  so as she's eating her treats and wagging her little tail, i'm so stoked that she's loving these treats and i'm busy thinking i'm the best new mom ever.  now, let's fast forward to four hours after she enjoyed the "treats." she gets these weird hiccups, her ears are turned down, and she's looking up at me with the saddest little face ever.  i pet her and ask her what is wrong (as if she's going to answer).  she then proceeds to show me what is wrong by puking up chunks all over the floor.  i'll spare you all the vom details, but she basically threw up her weight in those damn treats.  and then i text my mom crying and told her i'm the worst mom ever.  she texted back this: "wait until you have a human baby and you mess up big.  but i guess you turned out okay."

{this was me.  except my baby was a boxer/boston terrier mix and the poison was bad dog treats}


Martinis or Diaper Genies? said...

oooh I have something that will make everyone's life more exciting!

jessalyn said...

oh, i hate to tell you this, but i can almost promise this will not be the end of doggy vom/bathroom issues.

my german shepherd puppy was standing in my kitchen one day and literally exploded out the rear end, while just standing there. it even surprised him. you are not bad mommy, i promise. even if you do everything perfectly, they will find trouble to get into, and continue to disgust you periodically.

Cathy said...

Reading about your dogs vom makes me want to vom. Nasty.

Kristin said...

How about having your son and your cats vomiting all over the place? Now that's a special day! ah ha ha

bananas. said...

oh gosh, i pride myself on being a great mommy to my bullies but we all make mistakes, some more than others. this is why i cannot imagine having real children. goo!

CalgaryDaddy said...

Oh My..where or where did you find that Picture! Awesome. Nice blog!