news you can use #12: newlywed in jailed bliss, the skinny on mickey d's, bill and tiger, and the ga

newlywed couple spends first night together in jail.  a newlywed couple spent their wedding night in separate jail cells after police said the bride tried to run over an old flame of the groom.  well, that's one helluva way to never forget your wedding night, eh??  this story took place in none other than the hometown of one of my intahweb soulmates.  and you just thought the cape was a boring place!

weight watchers partnering up with the golden arches.  say whaaaat??  first off, let it be known that i hate mcdonald's.  not just the food itself, but the whole global phenomenon of "mcdonaldization."  (don't get me started.  i'm a socio-political studies major and this could get ugly.)  word on the street is weight watchers is going to be putting its logo on some of mcdonald's menu items in new zealand now that mickey d's is trying to make all of their "nutritional" information public.  can it even be called "nutritional" when it's pure crap??  call me a bad future mother, but i will not be taking my kids to mcdonald's.  ever.  period.  i will feed them pizza.  and ice cream.  and green vegetables.  and i will pray to God that they don't inherit their momma's food allergies.  otherwise they will only be eating quail and manna from heaven.

bill clinton offering support to le tigre.  really?  apparently the former prez gives good advice.  well, b.clinton should know best.  guess tiger and ol' billy will be like two peas in a pod.

{B + T = hearts}

sorry, she's not taking calls she's kinda biz-zay.  how can you not love her, people?!

{t-t-t-t-telephone}

like mother, like daughter: THE ga edition (aka - why i know for sure that my little nugget and i were meant to be)

so while i've was out of town for a business trip, bailey stayed with her mimi (aka - my mom, aka - free doggy daycare).  since i don't have kids of my own, my little nugget head is my baby; and like any good momma, i worry about her and check on her throughout the day.  here's the scene that went down yesterday morning:

me: hey mom, how's my little koo bear doing?  is she crying for her mommy to come home??

mimi: no, she loves it at her mimi's.  she's watching tiger woods apologize on tv right now.
mimi: but after about 2 minutes, she yawned and decided he bores her.  she isn't buying it.
mimi: she much prefers watching lady gaga.

news you can use #9: giveaway winner, THE ga, psychiatry, samba queen, cows in new zealand, and SVU v-day cards

the winner of my first ever giveaway is... juliana from a blonde walks into a blog.  congrats, m'dear!! 

{i hope you and the hubby luff them!}

THE ga and cydi lauper are the new faces for the M.A.C. AIDS fund.  seriously, y'all i'm obsessed.  thanks to my bff to this information.

{cyndi is sooooo lucky!!!!}

psychiatry's bible rewritten.  don't know what the psychiatric bible is?  it's the DSM - diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders.  kind of seems like it should really be called DSMMD, but what do i know.  according to an article from the washington post, "children who throw too many tantrums could be diagnosed with 'temper dysregulation disorder with dysphoria.'  and teenagers who are particularly eccentric might be candidates for treatment for "psychosis risk syndrome."  men who are just way too interested in sex risk being labeled as suffering from 'hypersexual disorder.' "  my questions to the DSM are: are you suggesting parents drug their children?  benadryl is an OTC drug, so i supposed that could work.  i don't know a teen who isn't a little weird.  AND what man isn't obsessed with sex??  i can only imagine what disorders i'd be diagnosed with according to the geniuses.

 the winter olympics start TOMORROW.  for the next two weeks my life will be pretty much booked.

seven year old samba queen.  seven year old, julia lira, gets the "ok" to be the samba queen at rio de jainero's carnival.  if you don't know what carnival is in south america, just think of mardi gras on steroids.  i dated a colombian guy and their carnival parties get cuh-ra-zzzzay.

{i have to admit, i'm really jealous.  i wanted to be samba queen this year!!}

new zealand has more cows than it does people.  this is for true.  "a record 5.8 million dairy cattle were counted in the year ended june 2009, statistics new zealand said tuesday — well more than one animal for each of the country's 4.3 million citizens."

{just because i know how much you all loved the cat tattoo.}

law and order: SVU has special valentine's day cards.  don't fret about sunday's big day.  you still have time to get your lover their very own v-day card compliment of my friends at l&o: svu.

{christopher meloni read my mind.}

praise sweet baby Jesus that tomorrow is finally friday.  this has been a hellacious week.

eleven good reasons why i want to be lady g

little girls are always wanting their barbies and dolls to look just.freaking.like.them, right??  right.  (this is a complete sidenote, but when i was little, my mom always struggled with finding the barbie dolls i wanted with brunette hair.  they were almost always blonde!  mattel has since gotten smart and is inclusive of all hair and skin colors.  where was "equality for all" in the 80s??  a little too late for me, mattel!)  anyways, i'm sure most of your ladies were no different.  this fact is evident by the american doll company whose "create your own american doll look-alikes" have sold like hotcakes.  american doll company allows little girls to create their own look-alike dolls picking the eye color, hair color and type, skin color, etc.  they even sell doll clothes and little girls' clothes to match so you and your doll can be all matchy match and everyone will point and be super jealous because you were so cool.  bascially, we're all narcissistic - we love attention and we love shit to look like us.  plus, imitation is the highest form of flattery.  even if you're a total freak, i'm sure you wouldn't mind someone creating a doll who looked just.like.you.

speaking of freaks - by now, it's no secret that i love the ga.  l-o-v-e love.  apparently the makers of barbie do too and i cannot tell you how jealous i am.  ladies (and the few gentlemen who are so kind as to put up with some of my non-manly stuff and read my blog), i present you with eleven damn good reasons why i want to be lady g: not one, not two, but ELEVEN look-alike barbies!!!

the "eff the bump-it" barbie

the "ga shield" barbie

the "no need for an umbrella" barbie

the "flaming bubies" barbie

the "classiest lady g" barbie

the "feathered face warmer" barbie and her friend, the "ron paul look-alike" barbie

the "don't look me straight in the face" barbie

the "i don't want you near my lady parts" barbie

the "gaga wedding" barbie

the "lace in yo face" barbie

the "jurassic park" barbie

the ga and other important stuff

is it seriously still not friday yet??!  maybe it's because i've been so insanely busy at work, i just feel like it should be friday.  ughhh.  fortunately i have something to cheer both you and me up on this especially awful hump day:

yearbook pics of my fave stefani joanne angelina germanotta

(better known to those not in the know as: lady gaga)

{seriously???  she's not even a freak here!  oh, and she hearts britney spears.  duh.}

{word on the street (aka - people.com) is she changed her hair color to blonde to differentiate herself from amy winehouse.}

{that's my girl!!}

{showing her true colors at the mtv video music awards.}

now that you've gathered yourself after seeing pics of the ga, on to some things going on in my exciting internet life.  i have to say i was totally stoked to be shown in my favorite aussie's blog: this is scoman.  seriously, check out this post.  he made a banner for me and i'm obsessed.  there's only one thing on the banner that is slightly incorrect.  i don't love all animals - mainly just dogs, cheetahs, zebras, giraffes, monkeys, penguins, moose, unicorns (thanks, jess!), ligers ... okay, actually i do like a lot of animals and i watch a lot of animal planet, but i HATE cats.  that was my point in saying i don't love all animals.  go check out that post on his blog if you don't know what i'm talking about or you don't know what a banner is.  maybe he'll make one for you, too if your special.  and lucky.  or both.  i happen to be both and then some.  scoman's smart because he recognizes that.

even after seeing my hot 80s overloaded with hairspray hairdo, shandal @ my life in 3d still seems to find me a rather beautiful blogger... oh, wait...  maybe she gave this to me before seeing the 80s 'do.  whatevs, this shit is mine now.  no indian giver take-backs allowed, shandy!  seriously, i love this chick and her blog.

i don't know the rules for this award, (quite honestly, i never know the rules for these things) so i'm gonna do what i want when i want and pass this on to these three beautiful ladies:

elizabeth marie @ it's unbeweavable

aubrey @ made you blush

kiran @ masala chica