news you can use #13: breast milk cheese, old people, driving and your cha chi, green toilets, models i know, eclipse trailer, and sweet layla grace

can you believe it?  this is news you can use lucky #13.  wow, i can't believe we've been doing this for 13 weeks now.  and by "we," i really mean "i."  enjoy some of the highlights of the weeks; there are some real goodies in here.

new york city chef creates breast milk cheese.  disgusted?  yeah, me too.  you can check out the recipe here.  ugh.  let me know how you like it.

{feast your eyes on this: "mommy's milk cheese rolled in dehydrated porcini mushroom powder with burned onion chutney."  i don't understand 3/4 of those words.}

oldest u.s. woman dies at age 114 year, 294 days.  i want to live until i'm 112 and still be healthy.  i'll let you know how that works out.  i'm sure i'll totes still be blogging.  you can check out all things old people here.

{isn't mary josephine ray just as cute as a damn button?!  here she is at her 111th birthday party.}

don't drink shave your cha chi and drive.  this little gem is brought to you courtesy of none other than mrs. tinseltown herself, hotpantsTM at handbags and handguns.  she down with the celebrity gossip and is your go-to girl on all things oscar worthy.   you can thank jessalyn for the new urban vocabulary word of the day: "cha chi."  i still prefer pikachu, but i'm all for spicing things up around these parts.  this lady apparently had places to go and wanted to make sure she was nice and "tidy."  i just threw up in my mouth.

{stay classy.}

the no-mix toilet.  men, how far are you willing to go to save the planet?  are you willing to sit down to pee, rather than standing if it means you are being environmentally conscious?  ladies, are you tired of fighting the perverbial "i-told-you-to-put-down-that-damn-toilet-seat!"  men and women alike, if your answer is "yes" then boy have i got the toilet for you!  per this article, "this toilet separates urine and poo-poo at the source.  the nutrients in urine can be then recycled for such purposes as fertilizer.  and the other sewage can then be transported to waste treatment facilities where actually can be used to produce power rather than consume it.  the problem is that some people might not like the new toilet.  for men it means sitting down, not standing.  and apparently the toilets are more prone to blockages.  nevertheless, scientists are reporting that europeans seem amenable to the new toilets."  those damn europeans are so freaking trendy.

{you would totes be the coolest house on the block with this sucker.}

i know someone on america's next top model (!!!)  i don't usually watch this show, but i was flipping through the channels last night and this girl i knew back in college is on this season.  i feel famous.  she's from kerrville, texas and she is an ex-boyfriend's sister's best friend.  she was a couple years younger than me, but she'd hang out with my boyfriend's little sister so we'd hang out all together.  she's considered a "plus-sized" model and is one of those girls that looks gorgeous with absolutely zero makeup.

twilight eclipse trailer.  ahhhh!  the trailer's out and i'm so stoked for the movie.  okay, i'll admit, i'm totally down with the vamps.  you can watch the full trailer here.

{my best friends forever.}

sweet layla grace.  precious little layla grace lost her battle with stage 4 neuroblastoma cancer early tuesday morning.  she was 2 years old.  many of you have probably already heard of her as her short life captured the hearts of many.  this precious life had a huge following on both her blog and twitter account and the outpouring of love and prayers has been amazing to see.  her family lives in one of houston's suburbs (the same suburb my parents live, actually).  please continue to pray for her family - her parents and her two sisters.

{layla grace marsh, 11.26.2007 - 03.09.2010}

news you can use #9: giveaway winner, THE ga, psychiatry, samba queen, cows in new zealand, and SVU v-day cards

the winner of my first ever giveaway is... juliana from a blonde walks into a blog.  congrats, m'dear!! 

{i hope you and the hubby luff them!}

THE ga and cydi lauper are the new faces for the M.A.C. AIDS fund.  seriously, y'all i'm obsessed.  thanks to my bff to this information.

{cyndi is sooooo lucky!!!!}

psychiatry's bible rewritten.  don't know what the psychiatric bible is?  it's the DSM - diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders.  kind of seems like it should really be called DSMMD, but what do i know.  according to an article from the washington post, "children who throw too many tantrums could be diagnosed with 'temper dysregulation disorder with dysphoria.'  and teenagers who are particularly eccentric might be candidates for treatment for "psychosis risk syndrome."  men who are just way too interested in sex risk being labeled as suffering from 'hypersexual disorder.' "  my questions to the DSM are: are you suggesting parents drug their children?  benadryl is an OTC drug, so i supposed that could work.  i don't know a teen who isn't a little weird.  AND what man isn't obsessed with sex??  i can only imagine what disorders i'd be diagnosed with according to the geniuses.

 the winter olympics start TOMORROW.  for the next two weeks my life will be pretty much booked.

seven year old samba queen.  seven year old, julia lira, gets the "ok" to be the samba queen at rio de jainero's carnival.  if you don't know what carnival is in south america, just think of mardi gras on steroids.  i dated a colombian guy and their carnival parties get cuh-ra-zzzzay.

{i have to admit, i'm really jealous.  i wanted to be samba queen this year!!}

new zealand has more cows than it does people.  this is for true.  "a record 5.8 million dairy cattle were counted in the year ended june 2009, statistics new zealand said tuesday — well more than one animal for each of the country's 4.3 million citizens."

{just because i know how much you all loved the cat tattoo.}

law and order: SVU has special valentine's day cards.  don't fret about sunday's big day.  you still have time to get your lover their very own v-day card compliment of my friends at l&o: svu.

{christopher meloni read my mind.}

praise sweet baby Jesus that tomorrow is finally friday.  this has been a hellacious week.

take me back tuesday

{quite frankly this picture should have been in this previous post about my lonestar state.  clearly, i am from texas.  i was in pre-k around 4 years old here.}

 {whoever thought kanye invented this sunglass look is sadly mistaken.  i was rockin' it long before the days of kanye.  i was 6 and a half here.  i know this for a fact because this picture was actually taken the day my little brother was born.  i totally remember what i was wearing.  i may look happy in this picture, but i assure you, i wasn't.  this day changed my life, and i was no longer an only child.}

{i apparently hairsprayed my bangs back.  i was such a classy broad back then.  thanks late 80s and early 90s.}

----

i'm not going to give a recap of or talk about last night's bachelor.  well, at least not in detail.  i will say these three things, however:

1. is it just me or are all the bachelors and bachelorettes kissing whores?  for real.  i'm not judging, i'm just making an observation.

2. my favorite comment from last night comes from christina: "my hands are sweating like a 5 year old boy getting ready for recess with his girlfriend."

3. these chicks are ridiculously emotional.  (vienna and michelle especially).  i'm a female, so i can say that and you know i'm for reals.

4. i find myself talking back to the t.v.  like when ashley (brunette, not very cute, kind of annoying, a teacher from pennsylvania.  she didn't get a rose last night.) was asking these rhetorical questions, i'd answer them.  i'm not sure she cared.  she clearly should have though.

news you can use #4: football, kate, and a birthday

tonight my favorite texas longhorns will be taking on SEC #1 team, alabama, in pasadena, california for the BCS championship title.  all i gotta say about that is i will be wearing my very best burnt orange and screaming gooooo texas!!

{i heart you, colt.}

F.I.N.A.L.L.Y.  finally my homegirl kate did something with that hot mess hair she use to have.  quite frankly i can't help but seeing a slightly older, slighter less attractive version of gretchen from the real housewives of orange county.  i could be wrong.  no, actually i couldn't be.  i'm never wrong.  moving on.  check these fab before and after photos of her first go at a makeover:

this before and after photo tells me there is still hope for me.  plastic surgery apparently does some amazing things for a woman.  it gives me solace knowing i can at least get a makeover after pushing some little humans out of my "pikachu" (as chelsea handler likes to call her lady part) one day.  i actually find kate semi-attractive.  and with the new 'do, she's looking great.  not beautiful, but attractive.  that heinously awful hairstyle overshadowed her cute face.  i think i'm going to kind of miss it though.


and saving the very best for last... it is my little sister's 11th birthday today!  happy happy birthday, BM!

{i know my readers are so clever, you all got my hook 'em horns reference, right??  just sticking with a theme here, people.}

walking the red carpet... again

i seriously feel like this is awards week.  i would have planned my wardrobe accordingly had i known i'd be walking the red carpet so many times.  the following two awards come from julie @ brown eyed belle.  miss julie finds me both stunning and chic.  she's obviously a very smart woman.  i like smart people, and i like people who love me.  this is why i expect her to go far in life.

i hope these ladies (and this one gentleman) are wearing their red carpet best because it is with great honor that i pass these oscars onto:

jessalyn @ cape cod awesome

monique @ a day in the life of a surferwife

cee @ curiosity

 cher @ the only girl

speaking from the crib

hallie @ wonderful world of wieners

sonja @ for love of stilettos

mrs. eyecansee @ the juice is worth the squeeze... 

 this is scoman

completely unrelated to awards, but still equally exciting: the bachelor.  i want you all to know i broke down and watched the bachelor last night.  that shit is like a serious train wreck, and my monday nights are now booked the the one hour while this show is on.  one of my real life bffs, tara, came over to keep me and bailey boo company as i watched a show about finding true love while eating raw sugar cookie dough.  that's true love, friends.  while i'm not a huge fan of the show, i do hope jakey finds love.  i would say that maybe i could be his one and only, but after hearing the guy talk for five minutes about what a hopeless romantic he is and how strong the power of love is and how he wants a "traditional life," i realized there was no way i could be with that guy.  sorry, i'm just not a hopeless romantic.  i don't think as humans we can ever love perfectly, that's a God thing.  human love isn't perfect and relationships aren't always going to be romantic.  in fact, relationships are hard and sometimes they're going to suck.  sorry to burst your little bubble, jake.  don't worry, i still think he's super hot and wouldn't mind seeing him with his shirt off a little more this bachelor season. 

{dear jake, maybe if you could calm the eff down about love being "perfect," then we could be together.  i'll maybe even try to tone down my bitchiness.  okay, that's a lie, but i'll still love you long time.  just take off your shirt and i'll ogle you.  k, thanks.}

well, i have something called "work" that's calling my name in the form of emails and phone calls.  don't worry, i'll be back later today with a little edition of take me back tuesday.  you'll get to see me in all of my cute-sie glory.  get excited.

thanks for all the hugs and love yesterday.  it got me through a really shitty day.

insider talk

** UPDATE **

(you know i never use caps, so this must be important shit)

over $500 later.... my little gremlin and i just got home a little while ago from the vet!  woo hoo!  she is alive and well, just a little groggy but still super excited to be back home.  now the hard part is going to be "not letting her run or jump for 7-10 days."  she's an effing dog, that's what they do.  we'll see how it goes. 

---

i was seriously useless yesterday.  i didn't changed out of the nike be bold running pants that i slept in or my fancy thorlo running socks that i haven't even run in yet.  i don't know if you guys know this, but there.is.nothing.on.tv.during.the.day.  seriously, nothing except law & order re-runs.  i have to be honest, i never really watched or even liked law & order, but with there being literally nothing good on tv, and my little fur baby gone at the vet getting her little reproductive organs worked on, i was sad and lonely so i laid around, moped, worried, felt sorry for myself, read your blogs, and watched tv all day yesterday.  i called the vet clinic every two hours to check on her. obsessive? yes. don't judge. anyways, back to laying around and watching law & order: special victims unit, or "l & o: svu" as the insiders like to call it, and after watching it for eight hours straight, i'm pretty sure i can be classified as an insider.

{check out my crew.  i feel like i know them after yesterday.}

as a result of staring at an LCD screen for eight hours, not only do my eyeballs ache, but i may or may not have a daytime crush on christopher meloni (or as the insiders of l & o: svu call him "detective elliott stabler"). and like any new obsession, i googled him and found a wealth of information from my really smart, all-knowing internet best friend, wikipedia (i call him "wiki" for short). i was given tons of useful information. like the fact that he's older than my freaking mother. only by three years, but still. that his ancestry is irish, french canadian, and italian; he's the youngest of three children; and he graduated from the university of colorado at boulder with a degree in history. oh, and he has baby blue eyes which i'm such a sucker for.  see what you can do with your time off??

{america's favorite dectective.}

{and here's a sexy time pic for all you freaks out there.}