Wednesday, March 31, 2010

there's a pageant for everyone. even you.

have you ever wanted to enter a contest or pageant but feel like you don't fit in anywhere?  if that's what you think then you are seriously and sadly mistaken, my friend(s).  there's something for everyone.  and my everyone, i mean EV.ER.Y.ONE.  don't believe me?  let me show you:


here in a shopping mall in shenyang, china is the miss plump beauty pageant.  i seriously thought this was a wedding dress.  or a quinceanera dress.  we have lots of those in tejas.

my friends in mumbai, india hosts the "indian super queen" beauty pageant for the transgender community. around 400 contestants participated in february. 


a balinese transexual gets ready for a similar competition on the island of bali.

khadra al-mubarak is one of the organizers of the "miss beautiful morals" pageant in saudi arabia.  the winner will be the one who exhibits the most devotion and respect for her parents irrespective of her looks.  i am fairly certain that none of my readers will be winning this contest anytime soon.

rita, who declined to give her last name, belts out a tune during the talent portion of the second annual miss independence day pageant at walden house, a residential treatment center south of downtown los angeles.  even addicts get in on the action.

and yes, there is a miss outdoors pageant.  dakota abbott was one of two pageant contestants to also enter the muskrat-skinning contest in maryland.  i'm fairly certain sarah palin could enter and win this whole thing.


these are the three finalists in the prison beauty pageant.  each september, the female inmates hold a pageant in honor of the virgin of mercedes, the patron saint of prisoners.  umm, cool...?

...and lithuania.  they call theirs "miss captivity."  wow.  classy.

baton twirler shelby annelle twirls her heart out in "the great american trailer park pageant."  tt was hosted by jerry springer 2005.  naturally.

there's even a contest between HIV infected women call "miss positive."  perhaps it's just me, but this seems a bit insensitive.  maybe i'm wrong?

the miss dog america competition is fierce.  my bailey could totes win this.


31 comments:

livin wide said...

hahaha, thanks for opening my eyes. as an indian, i'm totally proud of theirs. and i'm lovin the blog!

p.s. i haven't walked through the galleria here in houston a single time in over 3 years and not seen a quincenera party.

Vic said...

Tooooo funny! Yowza!

Happy quince :)

Cathy said...

Where do you find this stuff? Thanks for opening my eyes to the wonderful world of pagents!

Rachel Lillian said...

Ha love it. One very important question, though. How can I sign up for the "Great American Trailer Park Pageant"?

Mrs. Muffins said...

Omigosh, lol :)

Salt said...

Muskrat skinning contest? Wow I become more and more proud of Maryland every day.

Those transgendered people in the second pic...the lady-man on the left is super pretty! That's a dude? I feel really bad about myself now.

Maybe I should start a pageant for women that are jealous of transgendered pageant contestants.

Kelly @ Dare to be Domestic said...

I almost wet myself over the Miss Trailer Park competition it reminds me of that movie that was made years ago - crap I can't remember the name but it had Kirsten Dunst as the main character it was sort of a spoof on pageants.

I'm so excited about the addict pageants - Dr. Drew needs to get in on that action STAT!

There really IS something for everyone

Kelly @ Dare to be Domestic said...

I missed commenting about the Miss positive HIV competition - I'll have to ask my friend who works for the AIDS Action Co. if it would seem offensive. I'm going to think that it's probably a clever pun as well. HIV Positive with a Positive outlook maybe? :) Either way I like that there are so many of these for women out there.

However being from Maryland I'm seriously, SERIOUSLY disturbed about the Muskrat Skinning thing - those little suckers are adorable and that's GR-OOOSSS!!!

Aunt Juicebox said...

Dang, if only I were transgendered or locked up!

Erin said...

oh man, these are interesting to say the least.

also being from tejas, i've been to my fair share of quinces. i actually stood up as a dama in a few. fun times! ..or not.

Bathwater said...

I think this whole post is a bit insensitive. What's wrong with being Mr. Rehab two years running?

MiMi said...

Oh my hell.
I can't believe the prison pageant and the Lithuania one is freaky. I mean, what's up with those women? They look weird.

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

You need to enter Baily immediately. If you could combine the skinning a small annoying rodent with the doggy portion, then Bailey is a sure thing. You know, with her rodent catching skills and all.

Patience said...

ahahaha..that is so crazy!

B-Dub said...

You are my hero. I could totes win several of these! Off to shine up my tiara!

MCW said...

The Walden House project is cracking me up!!!!

Cee said...

wow...these are hilarious. I'm entering Hanna in miss dog america asap.

myra said...

hahahaha, i laughed out loud at work.

but, i'd like to nominate myself for "miss beautiful morals" - i mean, i am muslim after all :) haha. wait, do i have to wear the garb too??

if not, do you think you could get me an in? thanks, meredith. you're the best!

Cara Smith said...

On a positive note, there are pagents in this world you can win without having a boob job.

Except for the transgenders, I think that's part of the package on that one.

~KS said...

Hmmmm.... wow. Miss Positive? yeah... not so sure about that one... but all interesting stuff nonetheless. Happy Hump day to you!

bananas. said...

Miss morals pageant? Good lord...i think i'd scare off all the judges. ha!

Kiera said...

WHERE DO YOU FIND THIS STUFF

Clemson Girl said...

What about a pageant for the pregos? I would totally be in that (once I'm pregos) cause then no one could call me fat.

d.a.r. said...

OMG this is horrifying haha!

Tara said...

it's official, i'm moving to china to participate in "miss plump".

Smile, Emily said...

wow. interesting post! :)

ScoMan said...

I didn't see any "White and Nerdy" pagent. But I suppose it's only a matter of time.

Miss Captivity is the coolest name for a pagent ever.. and the HIV one is the strangest pagent of the lot.

You should enter Bailey next year. His trick can be "Running away with dead squirrel"

Not ready to laugh about that yet? Okay, well you let me know when.

Michelle aka Mommy said...

hahaha! OMG! where did you find all this stuff? you're so cazy :) man! there really IS a pagent for everyone!! too freaking funny. with all these pagents, we can all be winners. ha!

Bitch, Bitch, Bitch (Amanda Mac) said...

a few weeks ago i walked in to a bar just outside of hollywood that normally has bands play. strobe lights were in full force as well as disco inspired mexican music. then they started having girls come out from behind a corner dressed in puffy gowns...it was a pageant! the girls were looking kind of beat and then i realized it was a drag queen pageant! by the end they were lip syncing duets it was bliss

Erin said...

I totally needed this laugh tonight. Thanks, mer!

Summer said...

WHERE on earth do you find these things???

Love it all, seriously. I needed something to lighten my mood. =)