Wednesday, April 28, 2010

human men vs. animal kingdom men

i've always been attracted to large, "manly" men... okay, that sounded weird, what i mean is i've always been attracted to tall, built men who are manly-like and fulfill most of their gender stereotype roles (i.e. they're big, brave, strong, protective, have hair on their arms and legs, and aren't afraid to get dirty.  okay, i just described the brawny paper towel man.)  anyways, most of the guys i've dated have been at least 6'0" or taller.  quasi, for instance, is 6'2", about 225 lbs, and manly.  i'm 5'4", 107 lbs., and girly, so the juxtaposition is fairly great.  and while quasi is one of the most well-dressed men i know (he really should just own banana republic and nordstroms because the guy has the entire men's department of each respective store hanging in his closet), he doesn't wear bright colored boas, head dresses, jewelry, or gel and spike his hair. - point is he's not "flashy," no pun intended.  (keep reading and you'll see where i'm going with this.)

as a matter of fact most males aren't flashy.  human males, that is.  males in the animal kingdom, on the other hand, are a whole different story.  males in the animal kingdom are very flashy and ornate.  for some reason i find this totally interesting.  i may be alone in my interest, but why do the males get to be the pretty ones??  all the colorful, flamboyant males are on the left; plain, boring females on the right.


peacocks


cardinals

mallard ducks

lions

geckos: the male is the cool lime green one

see what i mean??  yes, i know, i know - the males are colorful and bright in order to attract females.  i watch enough national geographic to know that.  i just wish it could be the other way around.  hmmmph!

Meredith

37 comments:

The Only Girl said...

Please instruct Quasi that everyone looks better in a boa.

jessalyn said...

these are the types of questions that can keep a girl up at night. seems unfair, huh? poor girly animals don't get to be pretty.

it would be great if you could get quasi in a brightly colored boa and head dress. tell him it's for very important research. or something kinky in the bedroom. and take lots of pics (not in bedroom though, obvi).

foxy said...

Isn't that interesting?! I have to say you taught me something new today, Mer, I did not know that about the ducks, lizards OR the cardinal.

brooke said...

um.you are hilarious...this post just kinda made my wednesday...

heisschic said...

ack! so weird! I was just thinking about this sort of thing on my drive in to work.

my conclusions are as follows:
in the animal kingdom, with birds at least, the male NEEDS to be more *flashy* in order to mate. the more flashy the male (brighter colors included) indicate better health and thusly (yes thusly), stronger offspring.

basically, the male needs to be flashy to get the girl.

this is where i began to wonder if maybe the animal kingdom has it right- and we're backwards. with birds, the female has her pick of males... they do ridiculous dances and battles to prove their worth. do men do that for us? why are we the ones with all the flash and dancing trying to get their attention?

i went through all that this morning then decided that i dont really like bedazzled men, so i should probably just accept the world as it is.


annnd there's my novel for today.

Brittany said...

This is the most random post ever. But it made me laugh :-) I never realized that but it's so true. The males are prettier in the animal kingdom for sure.

jayme said...

yo fellow shoe sistah - so i think we should convince the entire human male population that if they're not flashy, they're dumb. we need some flashy men to attract our "boring" souls... :) xxoo

Ams said...

Yes, look how pretty those boy animals are?! Boo on that business is all I have to say about that :(
You make me smile....

Cee said...

Maybe we should do something for these female animals...makeovers perhaps?

Kristen said...

Have you ever noticed that men/boys typically have longer eyelashes too?!

Clemson Girl said...

So I think another reason the boy animals are flashy is so that preditors come after them instead of the mamas and babies. I could be lying though...

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

Yeah, so The Surfer is the least flashy person ever. And he sounds kinda opposite of quasi. Which is weird. The Surfer doesn't own one thing from BR or Nordstrom. He is also 5-6" shorter and weighs 65 pounds less.

I don't know why this makes me sad. We are allowed to be different. But not really.

Cathy said...

Why do you only weigh 107 lbs? Eat more marshmallows asap.

Salt said...

You have no idea how many times I have asked myself this very same question. Especially with the peacock thing. Like...why do you get to look like a Vegas showgirl, you stupid cross-dressing bird?

Sole Matters said...

i never really thought about that, but you are right! weird. btw, im TOTALLY with you on your "type" and im basically your stats as well. there's something about a guy being like a bear to me that i LOVE.

Rasha said...

Ya, this is true, very awkward.

Ed said...

At least we gave you make-up, so you could pretend to be a beautiful butterfly.

Ed said...

At least we gave you make-up, so you could pretend to be a beautiful butterfly.

Hutch said...

I agree, I need my men to be men and I need to feel small!

Bathwater said...

It certainly is the other way around for humans, though why you would want a man twice as tall as you I'm not sure.

Someone about 5' 10" 170 sounds like a better fit. Just saying ;).

Carol {Everyday Delights} said...

haha! this post is awesome!

♥Aubrey said...

Love it ♥ The men of the animal kingdom are flashy!!! It's so true...they outshine us in the wild :)-

Nikosmommy said...

My hubs and my boys have super long girlie lashes (unfair) and my hubs has got some serious fashion flair! (in a totally metro-sexual way)
His closet is brand-name top to bottom and he can shop me under the table any day!!! (but the funny thing is that he's built, burly, tall,dark AND handsome and has arm and leg (and maybe a bit of back hair) that last part I'm not cool with....

Karls said...

Sucks doesn't it!

I used to date men prettier than I... but the waiting for them to get ready used to really piss me off!

Tara said...

this is so random! i wish crumpet looked like a peacock. then he would be a fabulous accessory in my life as opposed to just being my stinky hubs. oh well.

ps- 107?! really? you just had to throw that in there? i'm starving myself for a week!

ppss-- you forgot to mention you once had a thing for leprechauns!

Erin said...

i've often wondered the same thing. it kinda pisses me off actually...but no more so than reading that you weigh 107!! wtf?? i'm also 5'4" but i've got 10 lbs on you. ugh, so jealous!

Kristin said...

Poor little animal ladies!

Candice said...

Sort of glad I'm not an animal right now.

MiMi said...

That IS freaky! I never looked at it like that...man, I learn something new over here every day! :)

Crazy Shenanigans said...

Totally agree with you on the animals.

I'm the same height as you and I have 15 pounds on you. Ekk! I now must work out. lol

Mai said...

Very nice blog you have! I was thinking about this idea you brought up, and I think that the reason we human women try so hard with the flashy clothes and flirtation is because we want the men to STAY and be committed. I have a feeling that if humans only mated once a year, the guys would be putting on quite a show to make sure that they got lucky that time around.

ScoMan said...

I think it's probably because, as with people, guys really aren't that fussy when it comes to a mate.

The male peacocks like "Yeah, any old dull brown one will do".. but the female peacock has to land the flashiest one she can get to show off to her female peacock friends.

Erin said...

I knew about the ducks and the peacocks...but man, this is really interesting. You are brilliant, meredith!

I love my hubs, but I secretly confess I wish he was a tad taller. Only cuz' I feel like Amazon woman most days (I'm 5'9").

OneCraftyFox said...

I have honestly wondered the same thing a few times. I luv animals and used to be a big bird geek when I was a kid, so the bird thing triggered these questions... I know, I know, I'm still a total geek.

Kelly @ Dare to be Domestic said...

I guess we could think of it in terms of Humans are the only species where the women is ALWAYS more fabulous than the men. ;)

Haddock said...

Good observation.
I think it is mainly for proliferation.

Claire Kiefer said...

Totally true, but at least we human girls get to be the prettier gender. :)