fashion, facial hair, and frail "beauty"

alright ladies (and the few select awesome men who read my shenanigans), we need to have a chat.  a chat about fashion, facial hair (specifically facial hair on women), and what our culture views as beauty.  

here's the thing, i realize that the human body is 100% covered in a fine, thin layer of hair.  i get that.  and most women either wax, thread, pluck, or bleach their eyebrows and lips.  it's normal, it's natural, and it's nothing to be ashamed of.  THIS, however, is a little different...

am i the only one who finds this both something disturbing and disgusting, not to mention itchy?

is she carrying a plate?

this has nothing to do with facial hair because i am less concerned about the woman (yes, that is a woman) walking down the center of the runway and more concerned about the chick in the red shorts on the left-hand side of the runway.  she looks starving and very ill.  maybe i'm missing the point of "fashion" and the "beauty" of looking like skeletor; but i am sickened that our society and fashion world often views bones and skin as beauty and fashionable.  yes, i realize that many men and women are naturally very thin - God created us all different with a specific purpose in mind; but no human being is naturally bone thin.

what do you think?

and here's the mastermind behind it all - patrick mohr.  mohr is known for his strange selection of models, often choosing homeless people off the streets to create his vision, for example.

there are two things i would say to this guy:

1. patrick, i get that you're an artist.  or a fashion designer.  or whatever.  i get that your into androgyny.  i get that you want to be unique and different and and push the envelope in order to create "art."  to that i say, that's cool.  your "art" most definitely isn't my thing, but to each their own.  you probably don't like the fact that i love to shave my legs.  we can agree to disagree and still live in harmony.  i like that your living your dream.

2. while the facial hair is beyond disgusting and androgyny isn't really my thing because i love actually looking like a woman, what concerns me most is that 90% of your models look sick.  like near death, frail, malnourished sick.  like the kind of sick where they should be in a hospital getting treatment, not on a runway parading their skeleton around as something of beauty.  just my two cents.

you can check it all out here.

news you can use #17: teenagers, a hated man, women's one true love, craptastic engagement, and a bestie's birthday

(idiot) teen accuses accuses mom of facebook harassment.  teenagers can really be little shits sometimes, i swear.  apparently some 16 year old little twit from arkansas filed a harassment complaint at a local courthouse when his mom shut him out of his facebook account after she read he had driven 95 mph.  according to the mother, many of her son’s postings didn’t reflect well on him, so after he failed to log off the social networking site one day last month, she posted her own items on his account and changed his password to keep him from using it again.  "the things he was posting in facebook would make any decent parent’s eyes pop out and his jaw drop," the mother said said.  "he had been warned before about things he had been posting."  i'm pretty sure i'm going to give my kids to my mother when they hit their teenage years.  you think i'm joking.  just wait.

shake them haters off?  that phrase is typically told to people who don't really deserve negative press, but this doesn't really seem to apply in j.j.'s situation because he is being hated on for good reason.  jesse james is the most hated man in america.  i'm sure this comes as no surprise to any of you, but i still felt compelled to let my readers know.

my true love throughout history.  i think it's safe to say, ladies that we all lust after the same love: shoes.  namely, high heels.  men, you know this.  there's not many women who don't love shoes.  that being said, let me share with you my one true love throughout history.  these pics show me how far our love has come and just how long women have been wearing heels.  some of these bad boys are from the 15th century.

 

a craptastic engagement.  lindsay lohan's pop, michael lohan, is now engaged to kate major.  don't know kate major?  well, she's jon gosselin's ex-girlfriend.  not-so-surprisingly, lindsey is quoted as saying this engagement makes her want to vom.  quite frankly, i couldn't care less.

{what a perfect couple}

a very special birthday.  one of my real life best friends, sara, is celebrating her birthday this weekend!!  she's been a bestie since our college soccer days, and after dozens of roadtrips and shared hotel rooms later, she's still a bestest!  (gaahhh, that hotel comment sounded weird, but you get my point.)  as an athlete, i think the bonds created with friends and teammates is really unique and tight.  not only is sara one of my best friends, she was an amazing teammate and stood ready to kick anyone's ass who messed with me on the field.  that's the benefit of being a part of a team, you mess with one of us, you mess with all of us.

  happy birthday, sara ann!!  i love you!!

swimsuits i will never wear

i should probably be talking about the grammy's last night, but with swimsuit season fast approaching (well, hopefully fast approaching in houston, at least.  it is 38 degrees here this morning and 57 degrees in my effing office), i decided i needed to scratch some suits off the list immediately.  i'm sure my faithful male readers are going to love this post and won't be able to get past the photos of the half-naked women long enough to actually read my comments and get my point.  ladies, however, i know you'll understand and appreciate what i'm saying. 

{i'm not really a fan of clothes that look like they were dragged through a garbage disposal before i purchase them.  well, expect jeans.  i'm okay with holey jeans.  plus, whether you have small melons or large melons, i'm pretty certain your puppies' little noses would peek out in the get-up.}

{anytime an article of clothing looks like an animal was brutally massacred in the making isn't something i particularly want to wear.  in this case, it looks like some endangered species of a new zealand bird has it's wings chopped off for this top.}

{i have to admit, i actually kind of like this swimsuit.  in fact i like it a lot, i just don't think i'd ever wear it as a swimsuit.  can you imagine trying to actually swim in that??  i'm pretty sure you'd drown with your arms attached to your body like that.  i'd totally wear this a a unitard top thing with shorts or a skirt, though.}

{umm, can you say "worst tan lines EVER"?!  and if this model's derrier is not fitting in these bottoms, i'm pretty sure my arse won't be fitting either.}

{the point of wear a swimsuit is not so i can look like i was wrapped with nude color ace bandages.}

{i don't care how old i am, i will NEVER EVER wear this.  in fact, i ask you to kill me if i am seen in it.  the hat?  maybe.}

{these beads go only in a 1960s door entry way.}

{she may be going to a texas rodeo, so for this, i will not judge her.}

maybe i'm just not avant garde enough...?

{mmm, i love a man in plastic bubble wrap.  it's important to always being "safe"!}

{i don't know what i love more - the clear, tinkerbell plastic wings or the red peter pan tights.}

{scary.as.shit.}

{when life gives you lemons, make an effing jacket.}

{marshmallows in yo face!}

{i'm not the only one eating too many marshmallows these days...}

{lady gaga, is that you???}

{did kanye west's grandma knit these shades?  i think so.}

{just in case she gets hungry.  models get hungry, too you know.}

{maybe she's just really really cold.}

{i think this one's just too big for her.  maybe it would look good if they had one in her size...  i guess the outfit doesn't come with pants either.}

{for once, i don't even know what to say.  it would at least provide you with a lot of personal space.}

news you can use #6: a new hottie politician, a disney star messing with my movie, hong kong, dangerous hot sauce, vamps, pee, and my little nugget

wow.  yesterday's post and the comments that ensued were quite the doozy.  i want to say a HUGE HUGE thank you to all of you who came to cheer me on against that hateful commenter.  i know many of us have had the distinct pleasure of receiving some pretty shitty comments from ugly haters, so i wanted to make sure you all know how much your comments really mean to me.  (if you're just tuning in and don't know what the eff i'm talking about, read yesterday's post, paying particular attention to the comments...)  **UPDATE: hateful commenter has graced us with her presence yet again today on this post and has made a couple super nice comments.  i appreciate the time you're spending on me, my blog, and my AWESOME followers today.**

okay, enough of that.  on to the gooooood stuff.  you all know what today is.  it's time for a new edition of news you can use!  i know, i know you're all super excited, but seriously keep your panties on.  i don't want to be seeing any of your pikachus or peiners.

scott brown wins massachusetts open senate seat.  scott brown (aka - political hottie mchotterson) has won the open senate seat in the state of massachusetts.  (one of the members of the trifecta happens to live in this great state.)  for those of you who refuse to follow politics or read a newspaper, this senate race was to fill ted kennedy's seat.  this is a big deal because it's the first republican senator elected in that state in thirty years.  pres. obama's state of the union address next week is gonna be interesting.  part of me is wondering if he's going to come out and be all like: americans, i hate to break it to you, but this is efffffed up!  (he backed scott brown's opponent, democrat martha coakley.)

{not a bad lookin' politician, if i do say so myself.}

zac efron looking to play a role in the hangover 2.  whaaaaaaat??  noooo!!  say it ain't so, hangover casting crew.  the last thing i need is for disney's high school musical 1, 2, and 3's star to show up in one of my absolute faves.  really, zac, stay away from my hangover.

{zac's on the far right.  i know this because i have an 11 year old sister obsessed with disney.}

{hmmmm, zac looks like he's grown up a little since his high school musical days...}

hong kong fashion week.  here are some particularly interesting pieces i thought you would enjoy.  please wear them this weekend and let me know how is goes.

{christian lou-what???  move over, louby, these goodies by guo pei will be the latest rage.  seriously, though, can you imagine walking in these bad boys??  good luck with that.  i'd for sure snap an ankle.  MODG, maybe you can get kim k. to send you these??}

{apparently hong kong heard all the americans bitching about how cold this last winter has been and ningbo greenland costume industrial co., ltd. has responded.  kind of reminds me of all the marshmallows i eat.  i presume - if i could see my insides - they would look something like this.}

 {i would totes wear this.  i like my "personal space," you see, and this seems to be the appropriate amount.  thanks, guo pei.}

{lee wai ling, can i have this whole get-up sans the ruffles?  thanks.}

{this bitch means business.  maybe it's just me, but this handgun isn't exactly "concealed.  baldwin pui, you're not really fooling anyone.}

{i can't help but think of some really nasty things when i look at this creation by fan chun pang... or maybe it just looks like elmer's glue?}

eight teens end up in hospital after drinking hot sauce.  you may have seen this article here, but check this out: "officials in germany say eight teenagers were hospitalized after a test of courage in which they drank chili sauce more than 200 times hotter than typical tabasco sauce. (wtf were they thinking??)  the red cross in the southern city of augsburg says that 10 boys, aged 13 and 14, drank the sauce wednesday morning, apparently in school. [...]  the red cross said that on the scoville scale, which measures the hotness of sauce, the sauce measured 535,000 — compared to 2,500 for normal tabasco sauce."  if you're thinking, wtf??!? you're not alone, that was my first thought, too.

i will be cheating on edward cullen tonight at 7:00 p.m. CST.  blasphemous, i know.  please withhold your judgments.  i can't help it, though.  vampire diaries starts back up tonight, and (i'm ashamed to say) after watching a marathon of it about a month ago, i'm kind of interested to see what happens.

i make surferwife want to pee her pants.   monique is a member of the very coveted trifecta, so this award means more to me than anyone can ever know.  she has a snarky ass mouth, and is funny as all get up so if i make her want to pee her pants, you know i'm just that good.

my little nugget will be going obedience school.  her selective hearing is worse than her mommy's and SHE.REFUSES.TO.LISTEN.TO.ME.